Freitag, 5. August 2011

Stones...

crocheted stones by craftymissusD

If you would have told me 6 weeks ago, that stones have healing vibes someone, I would have answered you a stone is a stone is a stone.
I'm that kind of critical person... not an easy believer having a logical approach to anything, although I'm a sensitive soul. - I guess, that's what makes me being a good friend.
Life has teach me to be a bit more open for what somethings scientists currently can't explain. Namely I'm taking Bach Flowers since some years again and again. I started in my biggest life crisis... in which I think I didn't get because I'm a weak soul or so... I stuck, because what happened was more than worst case. Something without explanation, something which needs all my power for almost two years. Yes, all my power. I'm a loving soul. That's why I gave all my power and even didn't realize that's too much.
I'm strong again, and I could feel how the Bach Flowers helped me going through a psychological therapy fast. They let me go out of the deepest burnout depression in short time, and I could start working on what I have to do to gain my strength again.
But now stones? Well, you know I had this backflashs four weeks ago. Very bad ones. I felt like my burnout is suddenly not over, like paralyzed. And I can tell you, I hate this feeling! And it's making me so sad! I really don't wanna experience it again!
This backflashs feelings let me feel, that I lie to myself, that I'm currently not over anything! And I was thinking about everything I still don't do or can't do, even if I should.
I wanna be the old Hanna, men! I used to be able to stand a storm hugging all around me to make the feel safe. And now? Still not back to normal? Yes, I do my job, yes I can overcome with all those little and bigger crisis in life. But still, I didn't get my discipline back. I don't feel, I do everything necessary. Somehow all my progress in the last years, made me enjoy life whatever comes by... I just take some things not so serious, actually they are!
I was looking for the right flower essences and discussed them in a German forum. Once again, I talk about my lack of discipline. I didn't have this before my huge burnout... I made such a good progress through the psychological therapy, I would even say, I've never enjoyed life like I do now... But, this life needs some discipline to be successful! I wanna be able to look after myself! Okay, so I was talking about this topic in the forum and one of the nice members there told me, if you feel you have a lack of energy try to use a Carnelian. Some days, I was already a bit into action, I think with the help of the flower essences and also my logical brain, but still felt a lot of tiredness even on daytime. Coffee didn't work well to wake me up, I was coming along a shop selling minerals. You would have never ever seen me having a look at those minerals before. I just don't really think they look good unless they are made into nice jewelry... So, I went in and asked for the Cornelian. It turns out it's a cheap stone and I just bought it. I felt a bit ashamed to buy a stone for 80 Cents only, so I just took blue Chalcedony for 1.10, too, just because I liked the color and the shape. And I put them into my jeans pockets as told by my friend in the forum...

Sonntag, 3. Juli 2011

Is this a backflash?


Dear artist, you met my heart!

Hamburg harbor yesterday

Hamburg Harbor (Iphone 3GS)

Half an hour before work, looking around this not very friendly place and found this beautiful old storage house.